Monday, May 23, 2005

The fourth semester at IITK

Well, by the time I reached my fourth semester, I had seen a lot of things. Had been into many precarious situations, and handled a lot of decisive situations. Done and seen a lot. At the same time, I had fallen neck deep into problems. One of them definitely pertaining to my studies. I had devastated at the way I had been performing, and some of my worst fears had come true. Little did I know that more nightmares were to follow.
That semester was the most eventful one for me... I saw some deep and miserable moments. Had terrible quarrels. Also lost some precious things. On hindsight, I had almost reached the nadir of spirits. Everything that could go bad had gone bad. In fact, a lot of irreversible reactions happened. Some of them definitely for the good. It seemed to me to be the end of a lot of things. Very fortunately, I made some new acquaintances. I met Dr Harbola Sir. A gem of a person. I think he played a crucial role in helping me get back to the rising curve. I gained in confidence, and poise. I learnt of my priorities, and redefined them. I made a lot of hard decisions.
In the end, I performed pretty satisfactorily. The downward fall of the graph had been checked, and I could heave a sigh of relief. I could now think of how to improve things. That required a lot of introspection. Unknown to most people around me, I was in pretty bad shape, all of this time. I had also needed a lot of help, and some friends around me helped me whatever way they could. Thanks to them that I am here writing this blog. :-) .

Friday, May 20, 2005

The third semester at IITK

I had so much fun in the summers that fell between the 2nd and 3rd semester. Played such a nice prank on this person... shefali_18. Memorable times. Spent so much of time just talking about everything under the sun. Ended up with some strengthened relations and some strained ones.
The third semester was more or less uneventful. I was spending more and more time hanging out, and became quite complacent about studies. In fact, I was very concerned about my studies, but I just did not seem to find a way out of the mess I had landed myself into. I couldn't focus at all. It had its toll on me, and often times, I would be so diffident about myself, it really hurt. I ended up feeling I was almost good for nothing.
Nothing much happened that would help me out of this. Though of course I had some really nice friends, who tried to console me in whatever they could, I didn't get the advice I really needed. I was going to meet my city friends very often :-)). And I was at the receiving end of quite a number of jokes but I couldn't care less. In second semester, I became acqauinted with Shashank, and I had begin to admire him a lot. I found his talents impressive and liked him a lot. I was getting closer to more friends and getting distanced from others.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

The second semester at IIT

By the time the second semester started, I had already made some new friends. it was a nice distraction from the slight gloominess that had appeared in the last few days.
then, according to what my wingies claim, i started going to city to meet my friends. :-)) That was a terrible one! You know, we see in those movies, how one goofs up everything one does. This was a classic example. I had an 'interest' in city, an old friend. And I wanted to meet a friend who lived close to this friend ( Please note the deliberate avoidance of gender-revealing pronouns! ). This was the last day of the first mid sem. I had also been invited to a dutch outing to city by some newly-made friends. Little did I know what I was supposed to do. I felt quite awkward, not knowing how to react and blurted out a yes. Some people claim that some subconscious emotions were at work here, but I think otherwise. Even till the last moment, I was unsure of what to do. Plus there was a small drama about another guy. These people just kataoed him so mercilessly. I was scared. Was I being an unwanted addition? Hmm, by then, my wingies asked me where I was headed to, and to avoid potential embarrassment, I said I that I was going to meet my friend in city. Of course I didn't meet my friend, and went on the treat. Spent like anything, and enjoyed pretty well. It was one of the first times that I had gone out carelessly and without any issues in mind. I just loved it.
Its a different matter altogether that being accompanied by 3 friends had had a toll on people's reactions. I was subjected to a lot of teasing and questioning :-)). Soon I caught this habit of checking my emails a little too often. And going out with my newly found friends. And spending a lot of time chatting with them!
Do I dare say some people felt neglected? ;-) I didn't like not being able to spend time with them, but I was slipping into a state where I found things out of my control. I hadn't yet learned to say 'no'. If somebody proposed a plan, it was always ok with me. Irrespective of whether I had my own plans... somehow I just couldn't say no. Due to this, I had to make a lot of excuses. That stomach ache during techkriti was a big lie. I ended up terminating my own plans abruptly though I didn't like it.
Talking of Techkriti, yeah the nose job was a pretty memorable thing. And the drama that followed! The tetanus thing- it was a brilliant prank that I almost single-handedly pulled on a new friend (with slight help from a big fat friend) was just so fundoo. I realised I could act quite well ;). One of my brothers- Akbar ended up supporting the plans without knowing he was doing this. He went to city in an ambulance, and I accompanied him in the ambulance till IIT gate. This part, me going on ambulance to city, was the most dramatic scene of the whole prank. I ended up convincing a friend that because of the bruise that I had got in my nose a few days back, I had become sick with tetanus. There was a very serious situation and I had problems opening my jaw. I went to the extent of feigning pain in the jaw. That worked sooo swiftly. My friends got so extremely worried and I extracted a treat from them. However, I soon realised that the drama also had its consequences. The news reached friends' home and I was afraid it might spiral a little too far. So I disclosed the whole truth. Inspired by the whole episode, I wrote a short and sweet poem! :-))
Second semester also brought in a lot of complacence. I thought I could score so well with studying so less in my first semester. Where's the need to study? And obviously the results gave me an appropriate answer! The course in electronics was quite interesting. Just about the only interesting course that sem. Technical Arts (TA) was another interesting thing. I so seriously screwed up in my first 2 mid sems that I had a nightmare in which I flunked that course. I really made plans about what I would say to my parents if I flunked this course... and so on. But I worked hard and scored well in the end. Such a relief.
How can I forget to speak of this another sweet friend. I got to know her over emails and the only one time I have met her, it was so so interesting... Very interesting and smart - I am one of her secret admirers. -oops, somebody just shot me. i wonder who it was!!! - anyway, we exchanged so many emails, quite unknown to most people! and talked about our dreams, our interests etc. This friendship actually grew over emails, and the one time we nicely met, it went skyrocketing. :-)
Our first hall day was also in our second sem. I called my newly made friends, and had a nice time. Both during the hall day celebrations and after it. I was treated by my eager friends with a very happy GPL ( bumps, for the uninitiated ) . And I couldnt have complained. I loved all the attention :-)) . Incidentally, our hall day fell on Feb 14th.

The first semester at IIT

I had this idea.. ok ok, I borrowed this idea from SKG. I am gonna write about my experiences in these 4 years at IITK. and to ensure that I do not miss out on anything interesting / important, i'll write them in 8 parts... one for each semester.

Having spent 4 years in hostels, i had some idea of what hostel life is like. But the image of IIT as a place of maggus was deeply entresnched in my mind. i thought people would be too pre-occupied with studies/books etc to worry about each others' ancestors and/or body parts. i was mistaken... by miles!
in the beginning, i was quite reticent and not keen to make new acquaintances. The A A A trio was good enough, for all i cared. But yes, there was this one interesting guy i liked. i didn't like some of his mannersims though. he wud snap back at u if u dared to ask him something. but he seemed to be reasonably smart ( a perception that was eliminated over time :-)) ). there was another guy i was quite friendly with, but then, somehow things didn't go well in that direction. first semester was all about those quizzes, mth 101, phy 101, esc101, phy lab reports... second yearites giving us directions for everything. and playing politics.
we had a very vibrant wing. a wing which had an active wing committee as well. and all sorts of amusing(on hindsight) things happened.
first semester was also about ABS. after coming into IIT, i felt surrounded by so many bright and intelligent people that my own self-worth seemed to have taken a nose dive. you know, there were people who could score high without having to slog into the wee hours of the day. there were people who had gone into olympiads at the international levels. there were all sorts of studs. i felt so overwhelmed. and then ABS happened. the timing was impeccable. i got the very much needed boost. now i could say to myself there are people who think i am worth more than zilch. why else would one spend so much money on an undergraduate student? i felt great. i had prayed very hard for it, and i had wanted it very badly. it brought me a lot of things. recognition for instance.
in my first semester, i also did that course, psy151, introduction to psychology. that was a course i had chosen out of interest, and i am proud i did that. very often people chose those HSS subjects that were 'cool'. i had shown the guts to do what i wanted, even against the advice of a few seniors who warned me that the isntructor would really make you work hard. The instructor (LK) was superb. Just too brilliant. Soft-spoken and firm. Knowledgeable and keen. Serious and interesting. I worked a lot in her course but apparently, my marks were inversely tied to the amount of efforts i put in! the first subject for which i had a nightout was this. though the marks i got won't bear testimony to the fact :-)). or may be they will, if u can appreciate the inverse correlation! _grin_ i still remember the remarks i used to find scribbled on my anser scripts. often they implied that the teacher liked my writing style, but the answers were found lacking in content... :-)) i remember every compliment i received from her! we'll revisit this last part again!
throughout the semester, i did not study very hard. i used to score mediocre (close to average) marks in most quizzes and mid sems. except for esc101 of course. that was my favorite course ( apart from psy151). i used to score well without resorting to hard work. that made me feel special. other than this subject, i think i was getting along pretty average. then end sems happened. and i couldn't believe it. i had scored great marks in _all_ subjects. except my favorite subject, the one in which i had maaroed a night out. anyway, i ended up with wonderful grades. and ABS. could i have asked more of my first sem?
well, not exactly first sem, but in the intervening period between the first and the second semester, i did get something. new friends. :-)) . we will definitely revisit this topic, and in great details ;-)
and yes, a description of first semester can definitely not be complete without the mention of this other friend of mine. we met while preparing for this interview. and we liked the experience. it was the beginning of a wonderful partnership. since then, we have partnered in umpteen activities and we have gelled extremely well. more on that later. through him, i met more friends, and some of them, long-lasting ones.
the first year drew to a close with a tinge of sadness. unknown to most people around me, i had gotten so used to living with them that when the news of reshuffling of wings spread out, i was very sad. i wondered if i wud survive the torture. i really prayed to God that things don't change, and luckily they didn't. we still lived together, me and my wingies, and i was very happy about it ...

Sunday, May 01, 2005

Sumit Gupta... bhai and friend.

Sumit Gupta
B Tech ChE IIT Kanpur.

That is my friend. The one who left today. And to think I am not gonna see him in the near future.
Terrible. Very saddening. Heart-breaking.
We were room-mates in our first semester at IITK. The 3 of us, me Vishal and Sumit formed a great trio. Going by the names of Amar-Akbar-Anthony, we were always seen together. During the 'informal introduction' period, on one Sunday we went to city at 6 am to escape the prowling seniors. Roamed around in the city and had sooo much fun. We saw Lagaan. Came back only around 6pm in the evening...
Then we also had all his songs. Bathroom time, or morning ragas... His was a digital player. On and off in a split second. And yes, his attempts at "Dil!!!! Yeh Dil !!! Deewaaa !!! " are now part of folklore...
He had something for Pandu. Always poked fun at him. But _always_ in good spirits.
His experiences with TA101!
His 'megy' , 'cane-teen', 'hole-1' , 'metch'...
Recently had something about this tsunami. We nicknamed him Tsunami Deewani.
Such a boisterous laughter that he had. And his shiny teeth.
He also shared a very close relationship with Gaurav, his roommate. And yes, it was alleged that there was an implicit understanding between them that Gaurav Singh would stay away from his netsends... We had tested this hypothesis and proved it, to the satisfaction of all the players... except the aggrieved parties of course!
Is going to Stuttgart for an internship. Might also go on for the Erasmus Program. Wishing him all the best for all of that.
I spent a lot of the previous few days with him... we were studying for OR. And I must say we worked hard. And I enjoyed every bit of the time. . . And yes, most of the time, I was wondering how life is going to be without him.
Its so strange. You make friends, then you move on. Most of them just get lost in memories. A few persist. Some keep in touch, some in active contact. I wish we stay as close together as we have always been, in hearts and minds, if not in geographies.
Missing you Sumit!