Friday, April 10, 2009

What larks eh?

This is an expression from a novel I loved. Truly loved. Since I am a fan of Dileep Kumar style tragedies ( I would award Devdas an Oscar if I could!), -(well, so is God, why else would I be writing about all this! ) (- oh I also love writing sub comments inside brackets!), I loved this novel. The other haunting expression from this novel is 'What have I done'.

Without sounding like a boring old widower, I must assert that I am suddenly feeling quite empty. Most of my friends tell me times will turn around and it will all be ok. But this period definitely has proven to me how important some people have become. Not that I had forgotten but still...

I have a long weekend with potentially nothing to do. A few movies on the laptop, probably one in a hall (alone) and sleep - thats how I hope to while away my time. No wonder I reach office pretty early on Monday mornings - I am so bored of spending a lonely weekend!

Thursday, April 09, 2009

That was quick...

My manager said that to me, when I showed him the results of a thing I was working on. It completely made my effort worthwhile. It also made me realise that I am better at what I am doing right now than what I was doing before this. It also made me happy enough to leave office at 7 pm. What precipitated my action, actually, was a frantic phone call from my flatmate. He had kept the house keys at a safe location near the gate and was concerned that someone might have seen him do that.

I had a long conversation with a friend about faith in this world. My opinion turns out to be that when it comes to money, trust is not a central issue. When the stakes are high enough, most, if not all, people will make the transition from the ethical to the not-so-unethical. People shouldn't be naive enough to trust others with their money. I stand by that!

Today's song

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Driving is fun...

I have begun to enjoy my drive to work - it is a cool 15 minutes journey and other than being punctuated by canine corpses, it is rather uneventful. The showers this morning made it a much more breezy affair.

Just this morning, my flat mate commented - "Teri biwi bahut khush rehne wali hai!". That was after I made a quick banana shake in the morning - a concept almost alien to most bachelors my age. I enjoy the process as much as I do the outcome. I wish I could tell Strato and remind her of what she is missing.
Well, every hour reminds me of what I am missing. The amount of time spent on phone has drastically reduced. Some of it has been replaced by anxious thoughts about the future. The remainder is still blank.

Having joined a small firm, I get much lesser holidays. This friday is a holiday for most people but not for me. Anyway, it is better to toil and do something you like than to while away the time doing nothing most of the time and something you hate some of the time.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

A lover of poems

As it happens, I love poems. And short stories.
I have written a few of both, but that is beside the point.

Just yesterday, I came across this very moving poem (again). It completely moved my cheese:

Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be,
The last of life, for which the first was made:
Our times are in His hand
Who saith "A whole I planned,
Youth shows but half; trust God: see all, nor be afraid!"
...

[http://www.poeticexpressions.co.uk/POEMS/Grow%20old%20along%20with%20me.htm ]

I am missing Strato, as is to be expected. The only other person I have ever missed more is my housemaid in Mumbai. She once vanished for a full fortnight and the housing society members threatened to evict us because of the foul smell coming from our house. It also explained the dizzy feeling we got whenever we came near the kitchen door - from the other side; to enter the kitchen was a long forgotten ritual by then.

Actually I am missing Strato very much. In a fit of rage, she refuses to speak with me. Anybody who reads this and knows her email id, please do send across a soothing email to her. Anything I say right now is only going to add (rocket wala) fuel to the fire. She is smoking hot, man! (Sounds so weird without the comma, doesn't it?)

I am working at a start-up right now. Everything is closely monitored and I am enjoying my work. I am in office at 9 and leave around 7:30pm. I was hoping they would make me the employee of the year, but then, since there was no cash award, I think it is alright not to get it! Not to forget that I am a fortnight short of the 3 month duration which is a minimum to be assessed. (It just struck me as strange that assessing has got nothing to do with asses. Probably they used asses to assess in ancient times and therein lies the origin of the [species] word).

Kudos to Jarnail Singh. Next I hear he is being signed up by Nike for an ad campaign.

No songs today - mood nahi hai.

Monday, April 06, 2009

What else, another tragedy.

Another tragedy in the life of Dileep Kumar. What else did he expect?

Still, it is quite surprising. Life seems to have come full circle. A long circle full of joy rides and a big bump at the end. Wait, its not the end - I am still hopeful it will work out. 'Against hope hopen'. One thing that I have indeed understood is that it is very difficult for others to understand your predicament. Sometimes even people you trust seem to not understand that there are deeper issues than what appears at the surface.
Life is complicated and patience isn't that common a virtue. I wish it were.

This might sound cryptic to most people except one. The one who seemed to be the one. I still think the one is the one. But who is to tell the one!

My head is spinning in full circles. Rapid circles.

For the first time in my life, I will allow things to settle down. Hope that everything works out. When I try, it goes in the opposite direction. So I better keep it slow. People who love you will miss you soon, won't they? I hope they will. I sure as heck already do!